Sleep deprived

Dang it! I have been awake since 5:00 this morning. I stayed up until after 1:00 am packing and getting ready and thought, "Oooh...I get to sleep in tomorrow." Nope. I should have known better. I've been awake thinking about things like...what shirt should I wear today...did I pack enough pants...where's my hair brush...really important things, ya know?
The last several days have been a flurry of activity and emotion. I have had to do a successive series of goodbyes...it has been challenging and I realized that I am not very good at goodbyes.
I have seen such a outpouring of love for us, though, through people bringing us meals, giving us clothes and gifts, holding on to our junk, being willing to mow our lawn and watch our house, being our power of attorney, giving us money, praying for us, and helping us with all the details. Thank you, all, we would not have this opportunity without you.
Over the last several weeks, I have been trying to imagine what living in a new country will be like and preparing myself for the worst of each situation. I can't tell if this is a healthy exercise or just torture, because it really started to stress me out and cause a few mini-breakdowns. When I told a friend in front of Ben that I had had a mini-breakdown recently, Ben cocked a brow and said, "Mini?!?!?" After a short pause I said, "Yes, in my line of work anything short of psychiatric hospitalization is mini." However, my construed rationale is that if I prepare myself for the worst, then surely things will be better than I expect. We'll see if it works.
I do have to say that packing has gone a lot better than I had anticipated. I typically am what one may call an "overpacker." This has always been one of my downfalls and I worried that I would not have enough space to pack all that I wanted. However, I have to brag a little because I packed everything for 5 months in Africa in 1 suitcase and a carry-on. It even weighed right at 50 lbs. I know, I couldn't believe it either. (I wouldn't say that I rubbed it in when's Ben's suitcase was 13 lbs. too heavy...I was just making an objective verbal observation of the circumstances.)
Anyway...I don't know that this is very interesting for anyone...so I'll try to go back to sleep for a little while. Even 16 hours on a plane tonight will probably not provide much quality sleep time. :)